The woke state of our culture is seeping into every little crack and crevice. What it looks like for you may be very different for me. As someone now with gray hair and a dozen grandchildren I read about it in the news, pretty much now, whenever I read the news. One writer even commented that for caucasian men, it is literally getting harder and harder for them to even open their mouth to talk.
What a travesty this is that our culture has become so infiltrated with this ideology. Sibling rivalry, whether it happens today, or 50 years ago, is seen as oppression. Just normal everyday life can be twisted into a life wherein there is an oppressor and the oppressed. Little children are being taught if their skin is a certain color, they are the oppressor. Having grown up in a big family, and seeing where we are all at now that we are in our 50’s – 70’s shows that even if you had the same upbringing, went to the same schools, played the same sports, wore the same uniforms, ate the same suppers, had the same parents…you all grow up to be very unique and different individuals.
So, just thinking if we control the environment for everyone, making it the same, doesn’t mean that we are all going to grow up to be the same. If we can remember a couple things: we are all sinners (Romans 3:23) and God is sovereign (Ephesians 1), these will go along way in helping us understand who we are and what is going on in the world. I really think wokeness is spiritual broke-ness.
Yes, our home is a flurry of activity as we prepare for another child to be married – this time, a daughter.? Being a traditional family, we are putting on the event, and with great joy!? We are preparing to release our daughter, in a sense, giving the responsibility of protection and provision to her beloved.
So what advice would I give to a family with lots of children, especially several daughters?? Since some have asked, I would say to begin the conversation now, between husband and wife, regarding courtship (what is it?), budget, expectations and more.?? Some have lumped dating and courtship together.? But the big difference is that a man and a woman in a courtship are heading towards marriage.? Dating, however, seems to imply a lack of commitment.? Yes, some who “date around” end up marrying that one, but dating around can leave great wounds.
Why talk about the budget when your children are young or teens?? Because this is a big issue.? We know folks who have gone into debt to put on their child’s wedding.? We know folks who spent $40,000 on the wedding only to be divorced a couple years later.? A wedding is a wonderful celebration, but it can be lovely and memorable even on a modest budget.? So, set a budget now, while you are thinking clearly, and when the time comes, make every effort to stick to it.? Pray, be creative, do some research.
In our case, our daughter wanted lots of guests, 100’s in fact.? So, the sit down dinner option was nixed.? But we will have delicious food for the guests:? fruits, vegeys, crackers, cheeses, shrimp, desserts, hors de voures, etc.? The setting is our home church for the ceremony and reception.? Since children are very important to the bride to be the wedding party includes 2 ring bearers and 4 flower girls, in addition to 7 bridesmaids and 7 groomsmen, ushers, musicians, and 2 ministers presiding.
This is also a time to let go……….to realize that the couple is establishing a new home.? It’s time to say, “I’ve raised you and love you and will continue to love you.? But if you want advice from now on, you will need to come to me and ask.”? That can be a very hard thing to grasp for a parent, especially a controlling parent.? But do you really want to treat your 20 something child like he/she still has a diaper on?? Cut the apron strings, in fact, start to loosen them little by little as the years roll on from ages, let’s say 1 , until the late teens.
Rejoice with us at this time!!